Study asks parents, kids which technology rules work

No phones at the dinner table.No texting and driving. No Facebook until you're 15.

Parents often set a lot of rules for their kids' technology use.But which rules are the most effective?And what rules would kids make if theywere in charge?

As CBC Radio technology columnist Dan Misener explains, that's what a new study aimed to find out.

What was the focus of the study?

The researchersfrom the University ofWashington and University of Michigan wantedto better understand "family technology rules." Essentially, they were looking at therules parents set for themselves, and for their kids, around technology use.

They surveyed about 500 parents and children, between the ages of 10 and 17, to try tounderstand what types of technology rules were most effective andto see if parents and kids agreed on what they rules should be.

Spoiler alertthey didn't always agree.

But maybe what's most interestingabout this research is they not only asked parents what they thought the rules should be for kidsthey alsoasked kids what they thought the rules should be for parents.

What types of technology rules are most effective?

The researchers found one type of rule that was easier to obey, and easier to enforce. It's what theycall an "activity constraint."

They'rerules that have to do with a particular activity for example, sayinga child just isn't allowed to have a Snapchat account, or a rule that says they're not allowed to play a specific violent video game. Or saying they're not allowed to swear online specific rules around specific activities.

The researchers found that activity constraints were more effective than another category of rules, which they call "context constraints." Thoseare more nuanced rules,and have to do with when or where a technology can be used.

"No phones at the dinner table" or "no computer games until after you've finished your homework" are examples of context constraints.

Kids reported that activity constraints were easier to follow, andparents found they were easier to enforce.

What did kids say about their parents' technology use?

The researchers asked children what they thought the rules should be for parents in general, and for their parents specifically.

"One of the most common expectations that childrenhad for their parents was that parents check in withchildren and ask for permission before they postanything about them online," saidAlexisHiniker, one of the researchers.

"This was much more salient among children than among parents as an important expectation or practice that parents should live up to."

So essentially, kids were concerned aboutparental oversharingor the "Mom, don't post photos of me on Instagram without asking" factor.

While parents and children agreed that parental oversharing was an issue, kids were almost three times as likely to say there should be rules around it.

What was the biggest issue kids identified?

Rules around parental oversharing were up there, but the number one issue identified by kidsfor their parentswas being present and paying attention.

"These were rules about deferring to the social situation, and being responsive to the people that you're spending time with, and putting technology away as needed out of respect for those people," said Alexis Hiniker.

"So things like not bringing your phone to the dinner table, not using your phone in class, put your phone down when I'm talking to you, things like that."

To be clear, the kids they surveyed weren't saying that their parents didn't pay attention to them. They were simply saying there should be rules around being present, and paying attention for example, putting the phone down when your child is trying to tell you something important.

Why is it important to better understand technology's impact on family dynamics?

First, because the technology challenge has become greater. Generations ago, it was easier to set rules and expectations around technology use, and to control access to the technology. Things were different when the TV or computer was in a shared family space.

But with always-on mobile devices in our pockets, the rules can be harder to monitor and enforce.

Second, in many cases, parents themselves have trouble setting and following the rules they set for themselves around technology noemail after work hours, nolaptop in the bedroom, notexting while driving, for example.

Research has shown that parents' media habits predict children's media habits.So if kids are going to have healthy habits and limits, it's important to look not only at the rules we set for kids, but the rules we set for ourselves.