Spiritwood, Sask., shooting still painful for mother of Marc Bourdages 10 years later

Ten years after the slaying in Spiritwood, Sask., of RCMP officer Marc Bourdages, his mother still feels the loss deeply.

"It is unreal to me," Yolande Bourdages said from her home in Quebec.

"It doesn't feel like it has been 10 years that I have survived my son and that 10 years is behind me. But the pain is still there. The intensity is the same."

It wasJuly 7, 2006, when RCMPconstables Robin Cameron, Marc Bourdages and Michelle Knopp attempted to question Curtis Dagenaisabout an alleged assault on his sister.

Instead,Dagenaisled Cameron and Bourdageson a 30-kilometre pursuit through gravel roads before shooting and killing the two Mounties. The third constable, Knopp, was shot three times but survived.

• Reporter's Notebook:Spiritwood, Sask., shooting: murder, manhunt and killer speaks

Dagenaisfled the scene and sparked an 11-day manhunt before turning himself over to police onJuly 18. He received three life sentences after being foundguilty of two counts of first-degree murder and one count of attempted murder.

• Sask. judge hands Dagenais 3 life sentences in Mountie shootings

Bourdages'sson,Luca, was nine months old at the time of thetragedy. He was dressed as a Mountie at the funeral services.

Sombre anniversary

This week the small Prairie town is marking the anniversary, but Yolande Bourdages will not be in attendance.

• Spiritwood, Sask., marks 10-yearanniversary

She saidit's too painful to come back to the place her son was shot and killed.But she said she has no feelings about the man who killed him.

"He is nothing to me. He doesn't exist in my mind. I have no hatred. I have no forgiveness for him. He's nothing to me," Bourdages said of Dagenais.

On Tuesday, about 50 RCMP members and residents participated in a memorial run to honour Bourdages and Cameron and to raise funds for a park in their names.

Today, there isa pipe ceremony and a traditional feast to begina memorial service where the two fallen RCMP members will be remembered and honoured.

Members of theRCMP'sF Division are expected to attend, as well as dignitaries includingFederation of Saskatchewan Indian NationsChief Bobby Cameron and northern Saskatchewan MPGeorginaJolibois.

Although Bourdages will not attend the ceremony, she has a message for the people of Spiritwood.

"I thank them from the bottom of my heart for not forgetting Robin and Marc," she said.

"It greatly affects us and it touches us to see they did things like that for Robin and Marc. One day, who knows, when there is a monument perhaps we will have the courage to go see it. But not at the moment. Not yet."

Memorial park planned in Spiritwood

Money is being raised this week for a park to honour Cameron and Bourdages.

Justin Duret is one of the organizers raising funds and planning events.

He saideven though he wasn't a part of the RCMP in Spiritwood when the shootings happened, it's important to remember what they meant to the community.

"We thought it was important to recognize what Marc and Robin accomplished here and in their lives what they did," said Duret. "

We think they should be recognized for what they've done."

Duret said it's hopedTuesday'smemorial run will become an annual event. Over the years, there have been small gatherings, but nothing of this magnitude.

"There are a lot of hugs. A lot of tears. It's still close to everybody here and their friends and co-workers. It still means a lot and still hurts for some people."

Crystal Whitefish and her sister Veronica Morin took part inTuesday'srun to show their support for Bourdages and Cameron.

Whitefish saidshe remembers how terrifying it was during the days that followed the shooting.

"Everyone was in shock," said Whitefish "Especially when they had all the roadblocks. It was quite traumatic. You don't expect something like that to happen in this part of the province."

Morin said the tragedy hit close to home.

"Robin was a family friend and was kind of supportive through our family trauma back before," said Morin. I have an aunt who's an RCMP member. I like to support anything that has to do with service members, because my late husband was in the military and my stepdad is a former RCMP member as well."

Two statues of the fallen officers are also planned for the park.