'Torture on the inside': Humboldt Broncos dad dreads anniversary of bus crash

As each day passes, and the one-year anniversary of the Humboldt Broncos bus crash gets another day closer, Kevin Matechuk can feel the tension rising.

His son, Layne, is one of 13 survivors of the crash. The Broncos defenceman suffered a severe brain injury and skull fractures, as well as two collapsed lungs, and spentsix months in hospital. He had to learn to walk and talk again.

"Anxiety just builds up every day that we get closer to the day," Matechuksaid.The father has flashbacks to the panic and terror of that day, and to "how things used to be and how they're so different now."

"I don't know how to describe it in words, but you can just feel it building It's kind oftorture on the inside."

The collision happened at 4:50 p.m. CT on April 6, 2018, when a Calgary-based transport truck driver, Jaskirat Singh Sidhu, drove through a stop sign into the path of the Broncos team bus at a rural intersection in Saskatchewan. The crash left 16 people dead, including two coaches, 10 players, an athletic therapist, statistician, radio announcer and bus driver.

Last month, Sidhu was sentenced to eight years in prison after pleading guiltyin January to 29 counts of dangerous driving causing death or bodily harm.

Panic and terror

Kevin and his wife, Shelley, learned about the crash 20 minutes after it happened, then spent three hours pacing and praying at their home in Colonsay, Sask. Eventually, another parent who was at the Nipawin hospital was able to identify Layneby his arm tattoo, and informed his parents he had survived.

But their ordeal had only just begun. That tattoo was prophetic.

Before the crash, Laynewas seeking inspiration to get him through tough times on the iceso he hadthe Chinese symbol for strength and theletters PMA which stands for positive mental attitude tattooed onhis arm. He could never have imagined what would lie ahead.

Strength and resilience

Layne spent a month in a coma, then another five months in hospital. After he was released, he moved into a rented apartment in Saskatoon with his parents, so he could undergophysical, occupational and speech therapy five days a week.

The 19-year-old still walks with a limp and struggles to speak. But, Matechuk says, his son isslowly improving and getting stronger.

Layne is aware of the accident and some of his memories are trickling back. Earlier this week, he remembered scoring his first goal in the Saskatchewan Junior Hockey League and gave his family the play-by-play.

"It was so heartwarming for us," Matechuk said. "He continues to amaze us."

The long-term impact of the traumatic brain injury is unclear, and Laynecan be "angry and confused," according to Matechuk.

Still, it's Layne's strength and smile that inspire his fatherduring the sleepless nights anddifficult days.

Last month, Laynealong with his parents and sister, Carly flew to Pittsburgh so he couldmeet hishockey idol, Penguins team captain, Sidney Crosby. Matechuk saidit was one of the happiest moments his family has ever had.

He said Layne hopes to return to recreational hockey and take a university class, possibly by correspondence, this fall.

"I really believe he's going to be able to take university classes and follow a path of a career. It might not be the career he wouldhave chose to go on before, but we just keep believing in him, and he keeps showing us that it looks like it's going to happen," Matechuk said.

A quiet anniversary

On Saturday, 3,000 people are expected to pack into the Elgar Petersen Arena in Humboldt for a service to honour those who lost their lives and those whose lives were forever changed. There will be a moment of silence at the exact time that the collision happened a year earlier.

The Matechukshave decided not to attend the public service. Instead, they'll visit the STARS ambulance crew so Layne can meet the people who helped save his life and see the helicopter that he rode in. Then, they'll have a quiet day with family and close friends.

"We just want to get it behind us. It's very tough on all of us," Matechuk said. "It's just a time that we feel we want to be with ourselves."

Matechukwould like more privacy after the anniversary, as well, yet decided to share an update onLayne's recovery because he appreciates all the support his family has received from Canadians.

"We know there are so many caring people out there, and we really feel that helped get us through."